The Spoon theory

I've been struggling with my health for a good couple of years now. After more than 10 years of going to doctors, trying new medications, blood tests and specialists, I finally found a doctor who listens and who took the time to understand my symptoms. It's been a year and a half since I first went to her and am so incredibly grateful for her patience with me. I went to her for a second opinion, as I haven't had the best of luck with doctors and wanted to make sure that if I'm diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, a lifelong illness, that it wasn't a misdiagnosis. 

Some of you may not know what Fibromyalgia is, or you might be part of the few who believes "it's all in the mind" and honestly, I don't care what you think. My doctor explained this to me by using the "Spoon Theory"

"The spoon theory is a metaphor describing the amount of physical and/or mental energy that a person has available for daily activities and tasks, and how it can become limited." 

This helped me to understand that when I have a good day, I shouldn't use all my energy in all the tasks I might have been putting off all at once, but I needed to learn to pace myself. I needed to learn that I can spread my tasks out and swop between my tasks, so I don't use up all my energy before lunch, only to crash and potentially have a flare-up. 

I've leant that managing your stress, sleeping well, being healthy and taking care of your mental health is vital. And this is not only true in my case but is true for us all. When we have a bad or trying day, we can't let it dictate our attitude and perspective. It may be a day where pain or stress is overwhelming, but I can still be a kind person, I can still be someone who is positive and caring. 

I know that I have an illness where I will have to wake up some days and put a "brave-face" on. Not for you, but for me. I need to constantly remind myself that God is for me and not against me. I remind myself that He is our Healer and that I need to be patient. But I also need to remind myself that I don't know the plans He has for me and that maybe healing isn't for now, but for later, because He could use me now, where I am, with what I'm facing. I remember that I am loved, unconditionally. I remember I am His daughter and that nothing anyone thinks or says or does can change that. I am reminded of the many times He has healed me in other areas or carried me through or protected me or provided for me. He is the same. Yesterday, today and forever. He is not done with me yet. My story is still being written and I need to trust Him. Trust that I am made to have unity with Him and that I was made to be in Him and He in me. I was made to be a light, to shine His love and His goodness to those around me. I cannot let my physical circumstances keep me from being the woman I was created to be. 

I don't know your journey or how you might be feeling right now. If you are struggling with an "invisible illness" that might make you doubt yourself or that might make you feel like somethings missing or maybe you feel alone and depressed. Whatever you may be going through, know that God is for you. He loves you. You are created with purpose. You are valued. He wants to have relationship with you. Talk to Him. Trust Him. Use one spoon of energy at a time and use it in a way that glorifies Him.