I'm ready

I generally hate, or rather, strongly dislike photos of myself. 

I always feel like I go out of my way to find a flaw and for this reason I haven't really been super active on social media lately. 

I only recently started posting again, and I realised I don't just want to post the highlights. I feel like social media has become this platform where we criticize ourselves to the core.

"I need to be more relevant, I don't get a lot of likes, I'm not as pretty or funny or skinny or confident" and the list of insecurities that often comes with the social media platforms continue....

So, this post isn't glamorous.... it's real and it's just me sharing a little of the journey I've been on about my thoughts and health...

I've been thinking about what affects me, and how it affects me. Who am I listening to? What and who am I watching? What am I applying to my life? Is it truth? Is it uplifting? Is it Word-centered? Am I listening to what God is saying and the promises He has for me, or listening to my own fears and insecurities? Am I looking at my circumstances, deciding there's no way out, or am I trusting a God who heals, who protects, who provides and who is always there, a God who loves? 

So here I am, posting a picture I don't necessarily think is the best photo ever, but I know that for the first time in a long time I felt confident today. I didn't look at the photo and think "oh my word, look at my skin, I should smile, doesn't it look weird, ag just delete it" I thought, wow, I've grown. 

I actually feel pretty today. I wasn't in a lot of pain today. Today was a good day. 

Yes, I still have some insecurities, not just physically, but mentally, emotionally and I still feel super down and out sometimes, but I'm not going to let it run my life! Not anymore! 

And as I'm typing this, I know that this will probably be the beginning of a far larger journey and I'm probably going to have a few bad days but bring it on! I'm ready! I don't know what the future holds, but I'm trusting for good health, physically and mentally. 

I can't be the only one who sometimes feel like this, so if you're like me, getting distracted by the negative thoughts or you're struggling to accept some health issues, be encouraged! Don't let your perception of another person's "perfect" feed the insecurities and fears in yourself. Trust in God, trust who He says you are, trust that He loves you, He has a purpose for you, and He is with you, always. You are worth it, you are beautiful, you are loved! Look to Him when you feel alone, uncertain, worried about your health, worried about your family, when you're consumed with insecurities, sadness, anger AND look to Him when you are happy and having a wonderful day! Don't forget to include God in every moment! Include Him in your rejoicing, thank Him, praise Him and continue to grow in Him. He is our Loving, Caring, Protecting, Providing, Healing, Heavenly Father ❤